Tuesday, September 22, 2009

Chester vs. Ra-Chester

The new guy usually gets called Puppy or Doggie. He isn't as smart as his predecessor. I partially blame this on who helps me to raise him. Chester the Rottweiler had as a surrogate Dad, one of the smartest Cocker Spaniels it was my pleasure to have known, Copper. Ruby, our current mid-size dog, -affectionately known as Bitch- has some attitudes about who's in charge when. If we're hunting, she will take a cue better than any retriever born. I was astonished when she whined and pointed the turkey family that wandered through our neighborhood for a couple of weeks. I don't bird, or I'd have let her flush them. In practice, she's too small for any game I'd hunt, involving dogs.

As a surrogate parent and role model, she sucks rocks. I've had to work twice as hard to teach Ra-Chester anything. I want to eventually teach him to follow me, as I bicycle around the 'hood. Basic moves, and housebreaking have been an uphill battle.

Ruby in all her bitchy glory.

Ruby Enthroned!

Ruby's Turkeys! Look closely! Mom and 4 chilluns.....

Sunday, September 13, 2009

All I want for Christmas Halloween.....

Is my two front teeth. Two upper teeth on any level would be nice. I'm waiting for the upper plate. 'Til then, I'm taking meals through a straw. When I get a spare moment, I'll post a pic.

Thursday, September 10, 2009

Anti Gun = Pro Murder

Let me make no bones about the matter whatsoever.
In My Honest Opinion.
If you favor any restriction on a person's right to own a firearm....
You are as guilty of the murders at Columbine, Luby's Cafeteria, Silver Grill, Etc.
As if you pulled the trigger your own damn self.

Any crime that could have been prevented by the victim possessing -and having the will to use- a gun, I hold the anti-gun crowd responsible as accessories before the fact.

Tuesday, September 8, 2009

tastes like vinegar

For those who know me, The Laughing Locksmith has been tee-total, with some small relapses, sips here and there, for four years. Since my motivation is different, I don't feel the need for meetings and other trappings, of the celebratory abstainer. Simply put, I will never let a hypocritical state catch me vulnerable that way again.

I guess I could be considered a friend of Bill. I know him as well as anyone else I met in a bar and consider a friend.

One of my props is a handy bottle of rum. Any time I feel weak, I pull it out and stare it down. Remembering the happy times, the times I was on my knees before the porcelain god trying to throw up my toenails, the happy times I wished I remembered.

I picked up a friend recently, though he needed another drink like the ghost of Fred Astaire needed a dance lesson. I decided to poor him one from my bottle. Not like I was using it or anything.

I opened it, and son of a bitch, IT SMELLED LIKE APPLE CIDER VINEGAR!

I guess the daughter of our freeloading roomie found it. Decided it would function as well for my use with vinegar, and she could have free booze.

She and her boyfriend are no longer welcome here. If the roomie doesn't like it she can leave too.

Saturday, September 5, 2009

Code Word: Screaming

I've had my share of disagreements with the supporters of the current administration.
Talk about an understatement!
Like Denis Leary and Drugs!
I've had my share, your share, your share, his share, and her share.
Most of these disagreements have taken place on this marvelous invention of Al Gore's,
The Internet.
I very rarely even used upper-case letters.
How can I be screaming?

Y'see the word screaming is the new phrase for those who wish to deprive me of my first amendment right to have and express my own opinion.
Along with Astroturf, and extremist.

Look, we had our disagreements in the past.
Indeed, the Clinton Administration made me feel awfully Jewish at times.
But I hasten to emphasize.
At no point in our disagreements during that time.
Though I felt your opinion wrong headed, and possibly suicidally foolish.
Did I ever attempt to deny you the free expression of that opinion.
I never dismissed your agitating as Astroturf, artificial, manufactured, contrived, meaningless.
I never questioned the validity of your existence.
I never denied Your basic Humanity.
Based upon the fact that you held a contrary opinion.
I was raised better than that.
I was told by a Canadian Actor, playing a Fictional Starship Captain,
That the sacred document he held in his hands, applied to everyone.
Not just chiefs and kings.
The Kohms, as well as Yangs.

That Document was the US Constitution.

It applies to everyone.
Or it means nothing.

I gave you respect, played fair and decent,
when opinions and people I liked and respected ruled the land.
Are you going to do the same, or was I a sucker.
Expecting honor from a politically motivated individual.